i dream in timelines;
in alternate realities,
in multiverses.
it is some small comfort,
at least,
knowing that even though
in this life
i cannot love you
there a millions more
in which i can.

~lt

so,
there i was;
lost,
with the only thoughts
in my head
being the thoughts
about you.

and,
oh,
how long i have wandered.

~lt

i have a difficult time believing that people can change. if anything, they only ever become the people they were always in the process of becoming. whether or not that person is the same to you is of no consequence; you choose if that new person is worth fighting for. and i don’t believe that God can change people, as bad as that sounds. if He could, i have hard time buying the idea that He wouldn’t change the souls of murderers or rapists or anyone like that. there is evil in the world undoubtedly because people refuse to change themselves for God. It is a change we must enact upon ourselves. if He did it for us, i highly doubt such a change would be meaningful; in fact, i imagine it would be akin to a creator turning switches on and off their robot. we are not mere tools for God to wield as He pleases, but instead, potentials for good that must be willingly fashioned for His love and mission.

~lt

i understand now.
the fear you felt.
the fear of flying;
of the opening of wings,
of leaping into the unknown,
of relying on faith.
but,
unlike yours,
my spirit roars at the void
and is ignited
by all that i can become
if i just
let
go.

i pity you.
what good are wings
if you stay on the ground?

~lt

the secret
is truly
in the breath.
the moment.
its right here.
its right now.

~lt

i guess this is it;
the time
to finally see
how high my spirit
can soar.

~lt

there’s a part of me
that still yearns for you,
for the future
we dreamed of;
making pizza at midnight,
slow dancing in the living room
after the kiddos drift to sleep.
but,
i guess that’s the shitty thing
about the future;
it doesn’t come
unless we fight for it.
and you,
well,
you were fighting for something,
for someone,
else.

~lt

i guess
i want to see you
one last time,
before i go.
i know we already said goodbye
but i want to see your eyes;
to see for myself
if your choice
is truly making you
happy.

~lt

i pray
that you have the strength
to destroy the fear
that forces you to stay
when your heart whispers
for you
to leave.

~lt

darling,
you can’t expect someone
to spend forever with you
when you can’t even spend a day
for yourself
first.

~lt