Begrudging Power

i wonder if you knew,
you know?
if you knew,
long before you told me.
you forced me to endure
weeks of silence.
could you not have spared
five minutes
to tell me the truth?
did i truly mean so little
to you?
it is the most telling piece of evidence
that i was never really your friend;
i could never have done
the same to you.
and it takes every part of me
to keep myself from hating you
but my heart roars
for justice.

i wonder if he knows.
about me.
about the things you said
against him.
probably not
because then the false sense of change
he is presenting you would come crumbling down.
instead,
i’ll let you carry that weight.
and over time,
it’ll sink and fester
and scream to be let out.
and then,
once you can no longer bear that lie
you, too,
will feel the pain you so carelessly dealt
to me.

~lt

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