Revelation For A Resolution

Since I began writing
I have become more attuned to myself.
I have become adept
at identifying what I am feeling
and putting it into words.
But tonight,
on New Year’s
I am feeling something
that I have never felt before.
It is a sort of
quiet sadness
that comes from the fact
that I am no longer friends
with people that once mattered.
A sort of soft murmer
that pushes me
towards a kind of
self-induced exile.
It is as if
I am in the transition
of letting go of earthly things
and embracing something
entirely spiritual.
I have noticed
a shorter patience
with people that are caught up
with the pettiness of the world;
of boys running around
in the bodies of men
hoping to get a quick
meaningless fuck
with an equally immature girl.
Of people
who desire monetary gain
above all else.
Of people
who’s idea of having a good time
means getting black-out drunk
on shitty booze
with shitty people
that don’t give a shit
about one another.
I know that I should be happy
but I cannot help
but mourn the fact
that I have awoken
and the people I cared for
only want to remain asleep.
I am alone this New Year
and somehow,
I feel that this is the way
I was always meant
to be.

~LT

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